Back to Square 1

As 2019 comes to a close its generally a good time to take stock on what this year has meant. I brought in the New Year, last year, in A&E, choking. Following this, I got my Eosinophilic Esophagitis diagnosis in April. It has been an interesting 8 months since, comprising of…

• 2 Endoscopies
• 1 Nasal Endoscopy
• 5 shots of Muscle Relaxants
• 1 Tonsillectomy
• 2 Accident and Emergency visits for obstructions to my oesophagus
• 6 weeks of heavy anti-acid medications

I can’t even begin to count how many obstructions I’ve had over this year that I didn’t go to the hospital for. I, also, can’t count the number of tears and the frustration this disease has caused me this year. University is meant to be a time of personal growth, fun, and hard work. Undoubtedly, a chronic disease hinders this pivotal growth in hidden ways that many cannot see. You may see me on campus laughing and smiling (maybe… on a good day) or at work, like a normal 19-year-old. What you don’t see is the chronic fatigue leaving me bedridden for hours or days at a time. You don’t see me sitting with my head over a toilet for hours waiting for an obstruction to finally move. You don’t see the liquid diets I need to switch to from time to time, in order to simply maintain a healthy weight. You won’t see how much of a struggle meal times can actually be.

I finally visited my doctor today. I’m being put on heavy anti-acid medication again and going in for an endoscope under anaesthetic at some point in the New Year. During that endoscope they will perform a dilation of my oesophagus, if all goes well, a few days in the hospital recovering. If it doesn’t go well, meaning, a perforation, then the outcome won’t be so pleasant. However, the chance of that happening is very slim. So, in that sense, we are back at square 1, which is good and bad because at least something is happening.

I feel forgotten about and alone. I don’t know of anyone else experiencing anything similar, if you are, feel free to drop me a message, would love to chat to anyone! This has, without a doubt, been the hardest year of my life, and often one that I’ve dealt with in private, unless, your Christie O’Reilly and I cry into ur lap at every opportunity. I am so thankful for those around me even if you don’t all understand what’s wrong with me because to be quite honest neither do I. 2019 its been real and forgive me for saying I am glad to see the back of you.